Hell 101

Ok! Basically it's been my unlukiest day since my last birthday! Why?! well, Prior to this saturday, I was given a choice, to join the Baguio trip with my sister and miss the Pulp Summerslam in the process or to watch the Pulp Summerslam and miss the Baguio trip in the process. So with a lot of thought put into it (actually it was kind of an easy decision) I chose to stick with the Baguio trip. Why would anyone want to miss the biggest rock concert of the year to just go to baguio? Well, even though that I am just going to stand up there at the concert, it's too f*cking hot so I'll perspire to death if I go there whereas if I go to Baguio I would still feel that there are still places on earth that hell hasn't taken over... ehehehehe... But then things went haywire! We were about to leave when suddenly my parents decided to join the trip... the catch here is, I was left here to watch the house while they're away... sad... very sad... DAMN! I should've just went to see Summerslam....

(takes a moment to gather myself....)

Ok! I'm fine again =P

I just finished reading THE INFERNO... well actually, I finished it about two weeks ago na, but I had nothing else to read so I just read it all over again... And no! I am not making a book report kaya ko siya binasa... I just find it more entertaining to read books whose authours are already dead and gone. Parang mas may epic feel yung story nila... ehehehehe

So basically, this book is like a journal of DANTE's (yes! that's where the name for the character in devil may cry was goten...) journey through hell... literally! He describes hell a little different from the hell that we know... you'll know why later... ehehehehe...

He belived that hell was divided into nine circles (nine levels) with each level taking on a specific sin... the "heavier" your sin, the more deeper you are taken... Before the first circle comes the VESTIBUTE, here lies the souls which are niether good nor bad (only to themselves) when they were alive... here you cannot say that your in or out of hell... in my words, they are in the LAND OF THE CONFUSED (make up your mind! are you in hell or what?!) =P

The first circle is LIMBO (circle 1) here lies the souls of those who are unbaptized... where they can never enjoy the "light of god" but they are also not tormented here... it's sort of like THE LAND OF THE CONFUSED PART 2!!! ehehehe ... here DANTE is joined by other poets including VIRGIL (yes! this is also were they got dante's brother's name in DMC from...)

Circle 2 is the CARNAL -> here lies those who abandon themselves to the tempest of their passions... in layan's terms, yung mga nagpapadala masyado sa damdamin... tsk tsk tsk... so friends!! wag magpadala sa inyong damdamin! gamitin ang utak! ehehehehe... MINOS guarded it's entrance... he is somewhat a cross between a bull and a human... their punishment is to be denied of reason forever...

Circle 3 is the GLUTTONS -> we all know who stayes here.... hahahahaha... the punishment is kind of morbid here.... imagine how they treat their food when they were alive... in hell, they are the food! and CERBERUS (3 headed hound of hell) rip and tear them apart with his claws and teeth.... oooooooooooh... that hurts...

Circle 4 is the HOARDERS AND WASTERS -> eto ung mga gastador masyado nung buhay pa sila... kaya ang iba dyan.. mag isip-isip na.. ehehehehehe... their punishment? dead weights are put on them... torture? something like that....

Circle 5 is the WRATHFUL -> here lies the souls who were so obsessed with war when they were alive so in hell, they are forever engaged in war... seems like they were not punished at all... ehehehehe

Circle 6 is the HERETICS -> where those who denied the immortality of the soul go, so their punishment is an eternal grave in the fierymorgue of God's wrath... my verdict: ANG TINDI!!! ehehehehe.... also it is implied here that even fortune tellers are bound for hell... kaya mga manghuhula from quiapo... HUMANDA NA KAYO.... WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Circle 7 is the VIOLENT (against their neighbors, themselves, god, nature & art) punishements were they were forever submerged in blood... feed upon by the harpies... and burned to death (again..ehehehehe).... ang morbid grabe.... ehehehehe

CIRCLE 8 is the THIEVES -> obviously the souls of the thieves go here... and their punishment is that their human forms are taken from them so they are leaft to steal the form of others... in short sila-sila lang ang nagnanakawan.... hmmmm.... eh ganun din naman dito eh... pati magnanakaw nagnanakawan.... tsk tsk tsk... hahahahaha

SOWERS OF DISCORD -> these souls rend assunder what God had meant to be united... mang-aagaw in short... =P and their punishment is that they are forced to go to this demonic monster so that their bodies are to be hacked and torn, too easy? well... the catch is that they never die (go figure.. their dead already remember?!) So after they are torn to peices, they put themselves back together then repeat the whole process again.... DAMN!!!

Falsifiers -> these are the alchemists and their punishment is that their souls are corrupted even more... where's the fun in that??

Circle 9 is the Cocytus (the last great body of water in hell...so there is water in hell!!! =P) -> here lies those guilty of treachery against those whom they were bound by special ties... in short, here lies the souls who betrayed their family and friends....their punishment is that they are buried in ice with only their heads sticking up..... damn... and why is this great body of water on ice?!!! well... here comes the part you never imagined, satan (yes... the evil one.... and he is also a prisoner here...) stayed at the middle of this body of water, and everytime he tried to escape, the gust created by his wings turned the water into ice, thus trapping even himself there.... STUPID ASSHOLE.... ehehehehe....

So basically that's about it... there are a few more details but I'm kind of tired already so just read the book yourself....
Pansin ko lang... ano to?!! bokk report?!!! hahahahahaha

CIAO!!!